


Find Something New

by PrairieDawn



Series: Extended Meatballverse [11]
Category: MASH (TV), Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: F/F, Internalized Fatphobia, Misunderstandings, New Year's Fluff, New Year's Kiss, Oblivious Kellye, body image issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 15:00:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28530342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrairieDawn/pseuds/PrairieDawn
Summary: After the Five Days' War and associated operations, Kellye has been assigned to Geneva to help coordinate a comprehensive catalog of Earthtoo's pathogens.  She attends the staff New Year's Eve Party with friends and finds a new romance.
Relationships: Kellye/Original Character
Series: Extended Meatballverse [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1100532
Comments: 10
Kudos: 30





	Find Something New

**Author's Note:**

  * For [justalittlegreen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/justalittlegreen/gifts).



> This one is pretty niche, I admit. A character we barely see on MASH (more's the pity, Kellye is great), interacting with OCs from a sprawling TOSverse AU.
> 
> I can promise fluff and cuteness, and maybe you won't mind not already knowing anyone.

Kellye stretched up on her toes, teetering on the creaky wooden folding chair beneath her feet, the fold of crepe paper caught in her fingers. It was no use. She couldn’t reach without a ladder, and hotel maintenance was tough to track down and even tougher to talk to since she didn’t speak French.

She stepped down off the chair as gracefully as possible given its wobbling and stepped back into another body. Furred arms steadied her. “Are you all right, Kellye?” Irrill said in that careful cadence that meant she was trying to keep from rolling her r’s.

“I’m fine,” Kellye said waving her away and blushing hard with embarrassment. She was always so clumsy around the Starfleet people, especially the ones who weren’t human. She pressed her palms to her cheeks to cool them. “D’you think you could use that universal translator you’ve got to get maintenance to bring me a ladder?”

Irrill laughed, and her laugh had something not unlike a purr in it. “Come with me? If Healer T’Viri catches me alone she’ll start rattling off more vaccination schedules. The woman has no concept of days off.”

“I know! At least Ambassador April made sure that we would all have today and tomorrow.”

“And then what?”

Kellye blew a loose lock of hair out of her eyes. “My team is headed back to Indonesia to collect more endemic disease samples.”

Irrill’s ears drooped a little. “I wish I could accompany your team. It is so dull staying always in Geneva.”

“Catching something your immune system doesn’t recognize would be just the wrong kind of not-dull,” Kellye reminded her. She saw a figure walking briskly down the hallway toward them and pulled Irrill around a corner. “Quick, this way.”

“If you saw her, she saw us. There is no hope!”

The Vulcan Head of Planetary Epidemiology turned the corner to follow them, her quick steps making up the distance between them in a few moments. “Nurse Chkit, Nurse Nakahara. It is fortuitous that I have encountered you. I wished to inquire about the status of the Vietnam pathogen survey.”

Irrill crumpled. “The survey reports are in progress—”

Kellye interrupted, “And will be on your datapad by the end of the day on the third of January, just like we said before. As of noon, the two of us are off duty until the day after tomorrow.” She blinked at Healer T’Viri, waiting for a response.

“It is not logical to interrupt critical work which will facilitate this planet’s ability to integrate fully into the Federation in order to overindulge at a celebration.”

“Local customs—” Irrill started to say.

“Local customs provide for a celebration of the change from one local year to another. An additional unproductive day is unnecessary.” 

Kellye smiled up at her defiantly. “You’re not going to keep humans from drinking too much on New Year’s Eve, Healer. And you’re not going to want them back on the job the morning after.” Kellye wasn’t as intimidated by the woman’s stern face and the apparent mystique Vulcans held among Federation humans as Irrill was. She’d seen Commander Spock in too many compromising situations during his recovery for that. “It’s better to get competently obtained data on the second of the month than botched collections by hungover, resentful techs on the first.”

T’Viri regarded her. Kellye regarded right back, just like Margaret would have done. Years of dealing with that woman, watching her stare down men who thought they knew better, had given Kellye the tools she needed to out stubborn a Vulcan. “Ambassador April has made his position clear. You will have your day off, regardless of my opinions on the matter.” Her lip twitched upward in what Kellye recognized as amusement.

“Will you be coming to the party?” Kellye had to ask.

“Ambassador April has made it a requirement for senior staff.”

Irrill chuckled beside her. T’Viri ignored the indiscretion. “See that you are prepared to return to work after the holiday,” she reiterated, then left them, robes swirling behind her. 

They made their way to maintenance. Irrill charmed the hotel desk clerk by being exotic and sexy at him and in a few minutes they were making their way back to the ballroom, Irrill carrying the front of the ladder while Kellye brought up the rear. The Caitian’s tail flicked back and forth with her steps. “So are you really going to dance with that guy at the party?” Kellye asked.

“Gert? I’ll give him one dance,” she allowed. “But I am not so interested in him. He is not my type.”

“What is?” she asked innocently, figuring she could give her friend a hand finding a date for the evening. Not that Irrill was likely to need any help.

Irrill hummed. “Intelligent women with expressive faces and,” she paused again, making that thoughtful hum. “Soft and round.”

“You like women?”

Irrill chuffed at her. “Are you scandalized or just surprised?”

“Just surprised.” Her capacity for scandal had been worn away long ago.

“I am glad.”

By the time they got back to the ballroom, Kathy and Simone and the purple guy whose name Kellye couldn’t pronounce were getting in the way of the Embassy catering staff. Two official looking people collected their ladder from them, leaving them standing in the doorway. “I thought this was an office party, just for the medical team,” Kellye whispered. The medical team, after all, comprised a couple of hundred people, about three-fourths of them locals like Kellye. They could easily fill a ballroom without resorting to inviting Very Important Persons.

“So did I. It appears that someone else had other plans.” Irrill dropped her chin onto the top of Kellye’s head from behind. “Now we will have to behave ourselves while the important people give dull speeches.”

Kellye flipped around to bump her forehead against Irrill’s chest. “This was supposed to be a fun night, not another chance to look pretty for the cameras.”

Irrill rubbed her cheek across the top of Kellye’s head. Someone really ought to tell her that level of tactility wasn’t really a human thing. Was she smelling Kellye’s hair? The thought made a giggle burst out of her and she slapped Irrill’s shoulder a couple of times and stepped away. Irrill considered the fancy decorations going up in the room. “I suppose since they are decorating, I should spend the time choosing something to wear.”

“You have the body to pull off anything,” Kellye assured her. 

“I’m glad you think so.”

“I’m going to have to spend all afternoon trying to find something dressy that doesn’t make me look like a dumpling.”

“Good enough to eat,” Irrill teased. “I wonder if the Embassy dress shop is open for the holiday?”

“Let’s find out. Kathy! Simone! You want to go shopping so we can look pretty for this disaster in waiting?”

The other two nurses, platinum blonde and brunette, nodded and hurried to follow. Irrill made a noise that sounded almost like a hiss but turned into a sneeze. Kellye hoped she wasn’t catching something.

*

As far as Kellye was concerned, the modern styles brought from the other Earth left far too little to the imagination. There were a couple of dozen other members of the medical staff who apparently had the same idea as Kellye and her friends, but the shop staff was quick and cheery and almost frighteningly efficient. They were delivered into the hands of a tall, beautiful woman with pale pink hair and a filmy gown to match, who gathered them into a cozy corner as though they were her personal ducklings. “The fashion back home is gowns that look like they might just slip off at the slightest provocation, but actually won’t. Lots of peekaboo windows and gravity-defying curves.” Their assistant glanced toward Irrill, who was making her way competently through a holo program that showed her wearing several different styles, then turned back to the three humans, passing one of the ubiquitous scanners over them. “Oh come on girls, give us a nice pose to work with, you all look like you’re being dragged to a gulag.”

Kellye stood up straighter, only to be confronted with an image of herself in her underthings. The assistant swiped across her own datapad a couple of times, and holo-Kathy was garbed in elegant blue chiffon that looked like it had come off a movie set. “That’s the one,” she said. “You can stop looking.”

“Easy to please, I like that. Now let’s see.” She considered Kellye’s image.

“Sorry, I know it’s not easy to dress me,” Kellye said.

“Nonsense, you have lovely curves,” the dressmaker said, presumably because she had to. 

Irrill, supportive friend that she was, added, “Doesn’t she? Try something in a deep red or burgundy, that will bring out her eyes.”

Again, a sweep across her datapad, and Kellye was confronted with herself in a very low cut dress with a very high slit up the side. She bit her lip and shook her head, sure she would never be able to walk across a room in the ridiculous thing.

“Hmmm, what about this, then.” The color on the second dress was richer. It was sleeveless and showed quite a bit of cleavage, but the waistline wrapped in artful, flowing lines that somehow managed to make her look taller and melted into a skirt that showed off her ankles of all things. She’d never thought of herself as having attractive ankles before.

“Mrrrow, that one!” Irrill shouted over her shoulder, the obvious cat-sound an in-joke between the two of them.

“Ook ook,” Kellye returned, though monkeys didn’t sound like that at all. She gestured to the dress. “This one will be fine. How much?”

“If it’s for an official event, it’s covered by the Federation. If not, it comes out of your luxuries allocation.”

Kellye wasn’t sure she had a luxuries allocation. “As long as I don’t have to come down and hem dresses to pay off my debt.”

“Not at all.” She turned her attention to Simone, so Kellye and Irrill meandered their way out of the shop, stopping only to pick up their boxed dresses at the door.

*

The little girl that still lived in Kellye’s army nurse heart delighted in the sheer quantity of sparkle and glitter the other Earth’s fashion allowed her. Glittery nail polish the exact same shade as her dress, a dusting of fine shimmer on her cheekbones and hair, and a warm pearlescence to the wine-colored fabric of the dress itself. The heels, on the other hand, were a torture little improved over local versions. 

Simone was barely wearing iridescent white fabric that gestured at being a dress, while beside her Irrill wore deep green raw silk or something that resembled raw silk perfectly, and had teased her auburn hair into a cloud about her face. Her canines showed cutely when she smiled in the human fashion. 

Kellye wondered why she’d latched on to her new best friend as a target for her envy and tried not to notice the Caitian’s graceful stride as Kellye hobbled next to her on impossible strappy heels. “We need to get you a girlfriend,” she said amiably, looking around the room. Tellarites were round, but not soft by Kellye’s definition. Regardless, she gestured toward Tinho Cerb with her glass and Irrill shook her head sharply. “Tinho has a sharp tongue. I haven’t the energy to argue with her all night.”

“You are too picky,” Kellye complained.

Irrill touched her shoulder, then ran her hand down the back of Kellye’s dress. Kellye shivered not unpleasantly. “I am more than satisfied with you for company.”

Again, Irrill was such a cat, rubbing up on her all the time. “Don’t lay a finger on my updo,” she warned. 

“I would never dream of such a thing.”

They found seats together for the part of the evening with the dull speeches. Kellye kicked off her shoes under the table and traded inappropriate comments about the speakers with Irrill and Kathy until T’Viri fixed them with a glare that made Kellye feel like a naughty high schooler.

Eventually, dinner was served, buffet-style so carnivores like Irrill and vegetarians like T’Viri could both find something palatable. Kellye looked around at the abundance of tall, lithe bodies around her and settled a few strawberries and fancily carved vegetables onto her plate. Irrill’s disapproval of her choices was evident on her face. “At least have some shrimp,” she prodded. Kellye obediently dropped four cocktail shrimp onto her plate and took a small cup of cocktail sauce.

They returned to their places. Irrill tucked into a steak and a pile of buttered shrimp, while Kellye nibbled on her vegetables and tried not to feel like all eyes were on her. In a few minutes, when Irrill came up for air, she pursed her lips and poked at Kellye’s plate with a claw-like nail. “I know you’re part monkey but you could stand to eat some real food.”

“Says the woman with a metabolism that lets her eat shrimp scampi without it going straight to her hips.”

Irrill patted one of those hips. “Are you letting Simone get to you again? There is nothing wrong with your shape. It’s lovely just as it is.”

Kellye shook her head. “That’s nice of you to say, but humans generally value being thin, and not just when choosing mates. Looking the way I do makes me invisible.”

“Not to me,” Irrill insisted.

Kellye shook her head. Irrill seemed to have made Kellye’s self-confidence her personal mission. She nibbled at the shrimp in an effort to placate her friend. 

Mercifully, dinner ended and the VIPs scattered to other engagements. A band assembled in the front of the ballroom. Kellye checked the time. Ten o’clock. There was no way she was enduring two hours and change in those heels. Now that everyone who didn’t want to party was gone, she didn’t care who saw her in her stocking feet.

The music started up, and she couldn’t help the grin that split her face. Whose idea was it to have hired a swing band for the evening? The song itself was unfamiliar, but she knew how to move to this music. She looked for a warm body to take to the dance floor and settled on Bobby Moutin, who had nice moves and was already snapping his fingers and tapping his foot against the wall beside the dance floor.

She made eyes at him because a nice girl waits to be asked, and like a good colleague, he sauntered over and spun her on to the dance floor, keeping his moves simple and slow to start, then picking up the pace and complexity when he realized she did in fact know how to swing dance.

Darn right chubby girl can dance, she thought, spinning away from him and back to give him a sassy hip check. He spun her back out, she took another proffered hand and spun in to find herself smack up against, face to face—to be fair, face to bosom— with Irrill. The incongruity of it all made her lose her rhythm entirely and she dissolved into helpless laughter.

“Show me this dance,” Irrill demanded, taking one step back.

As soon as Kellye could breathe again she nodded. “Okay. So you see how those two are standing, how he’s holding her?” Irrill nodded and positioned herself. “You’re a lot taller than I am, so it will probably work better if you lead. First, you step and kick, and then the same thing but with the opposite foot…”

Irrill wasn’t actually a bad dancer, but it took a while for her to pick up the moves, and they ended up on their butts on the dance floor a couple of times. By the time they had the moves working, the music changed to mushier slow dancing and Kellye made her way off the floor in search of a drink or three. 

“You two looked cute out there,” the purple guy whose name Kellye couldn’t pronounce said while passing her a cup of something pink, fruity, and probably alcoholic. She threw it down, thirsty from the exercise. Definitely alcoholic. She could use another one of those.

“Irrill looks cute no matter what she’s doing. I think it’s the whiskers,” Kellye told him.

Purple Guy chuckled. “Uh-huh, if you say so.”

She looked around for Kathy and Simone. Simone was in a dim corner getting her tonsils examined, it looked like. Kathy was standing by the punch bowl looking not exactly lonely, but not exactly like she was having fun, either. Kellye headed over to her with Irrill on her tail, metaphorically speaking.

Kathy had always been a morning person, which was a useful trait for a nurse, but not a characteristic that lent itself well to partying all night. “You know,” Kellye told her, “you’re not obligated to stay until midnight. I’d hate to see you turn into a pumpkin.”

“What time is it?”

“Twenty till.”

“I’ll stay. My fairy godmother’s curfew isn’t that strict.” She yawned, casting some doubt on her optimism.

“We’ll keep you awake, won’t we Irrill?”

To her surprise, the usually easygoing Irrill sounded almost annoyed. “I was hoping to get in another dance,” she said.

Kellye shook her head. “They’ll be doing slow dances until midnight anyway. Nothing really fun.”

“Says you.”

Kathy snorted into her drink. “You two need to get a room.”

“What does she mean?”

Kellye felt herself blush all the way to her hairline. “Bend down here.”

Irrill bent her knees while Kellye stretched up on her toes to whisper in one fuzzy pointed ear. Irrill purred obnoxiously. As soon as Kellye stepped away, Irrill blinked at Kathy, all innocence, poked her tongue out for a moment in a very catlike fashion, and said, “I’m trying, Kathy, I’m trying.”

Kellye laughed. “You know, you’re never going to find someone as long as you keep up pretending to be interested in—”

“Oh hey, it’s almost midnight!” Kathy grabbed each of them by the arms and dragged them back toward the dance floor, where the crowd gathered around a large party clock counting down the minutes.

Kellye snagged some glasses of champagne from the side table where they’d been set up and handed one to Irrill and one to Kathy. 

Kathy grinned at both of them. “I’m going to find someone without a partner. Kellye, you should make sure Irrill gets the whole New Year’s experience.” She patted Kellye’s arm and melted into the crowd.

By the time Kellye regained the power of speech, the countdown had begun. She shouted along with everyone including Irrill, who had slid an arm around her shoulders. Streamers, glittery confetti, and balloons dropped from the ceiling, and the swing band obligingly began to play Auld Lang Syne. Irrill held up her glass. Kellye tapped them together and took a large swig for courage, then pulled Irrill toward her to plant a kiss on that fuzzy face.

It was both more and less like kissing a human person than she’d thought it might be. Irrill’s facial hair was softer and denser than a man’s mustache, her mouth still tasted faintly of steak and scampi under the champagne, and her tongue when it slipped out to brush Kellye’s lips was cat-rough. What she hadn’t expected was the rush of delight and she couldn’t deny it, the arousal that made its way from the top of her head down to her toes with an unmistakable stop halfway.

Someone was catcalling. She broke off to a chorus of Ooooohs and Awwwwwws from her assembled coworkers and hid her face in Irrill’s bodice. Irrill looked down at her and said, quietly, “Mrow.”

“Ook.” Kellye giggled back. 

Irrill reached between them to tilt Kellye’s chin up. “I never asked you your type.”

Kellye looked up into Irrill’s eyes, the slit pupils so wide they were almost round, the irises a mere thin ring of gold. She wrapped her arms around her to pull her close. “You, I think.”

Irrill gestured toward the dance floor with her chin. “They’re back to playing slow dances, Kellye. Would you be willing?”

It was a crazy beautiful end to a crazy awful year. “I’d love to.”


End file.
